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Friday, January 14, 2011

Not One Day Longer

I'm over at Grown in My Heart today, talking about why the Tongginator will be joining us on our second adoption trip this spring in my post Not One Day Longer. Hope to see y'all there!


Sharon Ankerich said...

I just wanted to let you know this was a GREAT post! We too took our five year old with us to adopt her little sister about 4 months ago and it was THE best thing we could have ever done. It was NOT easy and smooth and fun... it was hard and rocky and scary for all of us. EK had to learn how to be a sister and China was the place to begin this very important journey! I think having her there made the transition for SJ SO much easier although it was a very painful day!!! I wouldn't change it for the world and know they are so in love now because they began that love in their homeland together!!!
Blessings and Joy on this amazing journey with your daughters!!! :)

Wendy said...

Totally agree with Sharon. Having Becky (age 13) there for Lily when we adopted her from Thailand helped Lily's transition tremendously. Lily was terrified and grieving; she needed to see another Asian face. I cannot imagine how much more difficult Lily's transition would have been if it had not been for her sister's presence. And Becky was so proud to be the one who could help ease Lily's pain. It was the beginning of an incredible sisterly bond--despite a 13 year age difference--that continues to this day.

Mary Anne Gruen said...

It sounds like you're doing the right thing. Not only does she get to see China, she gets to be involved in this very important moment. I don't see how anyone could object.

Patricia/NYC said...

Great post, TM & I also agree with you 100% about bringing "T" with you...on so many levels this will be fabulous...for her, for her "mei-mei" for you & TG too! I hope you will share your journey with us...I am so THRILLED for you all that your time is finally coming!! :)

Deb said...

TM.....I just read your post....I did not even realize that you were this close to your LID! You have me psyched now! So happy that this wait is nearly coming to an end for you all! Hope you have a great weekend!

Mia_h_n said...

TM, I loved this post. Once again I can't tell you how right I think you are in taking the Tongginator with you! Like you said, this is her family, too. She has waited just as long as you and the husband.

Mama.The.Dragon said...

If we were so lucky enough to be traveling within the next few months to adopt again, we would be taking our TongGu Girl along as well. And we don't have the luxury of having a worldly Grandma to help out! - Y'all will have a GREAT time; Even if there are bad moments, it will be a great trip!

Briana's Mom said...

Such a good post! If I was going to adopt again, I would bring Bri along as well. I will be visiting China again though - most definitely.

The Byrd's Nest said...

I can't believe anyone would tell you she shouldn't go...she absolutely positively should go!!! She more than anyone should go!!! She needs to see where she came from AND what a blessing she will be to her little sister, she will put her at so much ease. Lottie did with Emma....Emma has always loved Lottie:) You're a great Mom my friend:)

LucisMomma said...

I'm one of those homeschoolers whose family does almost everything together. I cannot imagine going to China without our boys. They were 13 and 9 at the time of our trip 5 years ago. Our DD was comforted by their presence...one afternoon she woke up from her nap (DH took the boys swimming in the hotel pool) and she and I looked through our little photo album. She was only 9 months old and was not really happy with just me--she perked up and got all excited when we got to the boys' photos...started looking all around the room for them. We headed down to the depths of the hotel and found the pool and her brothers. She was happy seeing their silly faces.

Besides the obvious good that seeing her homeland again will do for her (regardless of her reaction, it will be a good thing overall, I think--good for her heart and future emotional stability)...what a blessing to Miss T to be able to go (thank God that the money is there for this trip), and have Tonggu Grammy with her. What a blessing to see her new Mei Mei first, with Mommy and Daddy, instead of waiting until you all get home. What a blessing it will be for the new Mei Mei, too. And it helps mommy feel secure if she can see all of her babies' faces--I cannot imagine being separated for that long and for such a great distance.

I had never heard that 3 trips, if possible, are recommended. Wow. I would love to be able to do that. Prayers that your Miss T will have a good visit and get to see all that help her grow more secure where she is.

April said...

Didn't realize that there are recommendations for certain age ranges when an adopted child should re experience their birth country-so GOOD to know!! Makes me completely rethink my timeline for a trip back to Thailand.
So very excited for you all as you get closer to your little girl :) We took G with us on our trip to get Prim and I was so thankful to have him there with us b/c he gets to tell his sister about the Thailand HE remembers. Now granted most of his memories from three years ago are centered around food...it's still great that he can share those memories with her until she has her own!!

the meaklims said...

I enjoyed this post TM. I am so with you on this. And I felt you responded to some issues (in the comments) very well.

I can't even imagine the idea of not bringing our daughter with us, if and when we go back to China. To me, she is our family, and if we add another, well, this is something we are all doing together, as a family.

Plus I know she'd be SO mad with us if we didn't bring her! Heh! :)


PS - I know sometimes financially it isn't possible: I totally get that.

Reena said...

We took our then 3-year old with us to China to adopt her little sister who was not quite 2-years old. Our 3- now 4-year old still talks about the trip and that she went with us to adopt her baby sister.