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Thursday, February 11, 2010

sNOwbound

subtitled "what just three hours of Blizzard Day Seven looks like at our house"

8:07 AM
Open my eyes to the oh-so-soothing sounds of "Duh-Duh-Dora; Duh-Duh-Duh-Dora" blasting from the television downstairs. Feel grateful that my Rockstar Husband allowed me to sleep in a little bit. Actively loathe Dora the Explorer.

8:15 AM
Stumble downstairs, looking for coffee, only to find an empty pot. Make coffee. Wait, standing like a zombie in front of said pot, while the Tongginator chatters incessantly, weaving round and round my legs. Do not process any of the Tongginator's words because the promise of coffee distracts.

8:23 AM
Drink first cup of coffee. Actually wake up. Okay, sort of wake up. Say good morning to the Tongginator.

8:27 AM
Stumble, slightly less zombie-like, to the family room window to see if Molly survived the night on her bed. Notice that Molly is nowhere to be found. Commence worrying about the stupid cat.

8:45 AM
Feel intense guilt about not immediately shoveling off the back deck for said stupid cat. Try to open the kitchen door, but gale force winds cause door to close. Eat a doughnut* to ease the guilt. Alright, TWO doughnuts.* Drink a second cup of coffee. You know, to go with the doughnut(s).*

9:00 AM
Realize doughnuts* do not erase shoveling guilt. Guilt quadruples. As does self-pity. Cram feet into boots. Don coat and gloves.

9:02 AM
Shovel off seven inches of snow from the deck while still wearing pajamas in order to reduce laundry pile. Get gloves wet. Feel fingers slowly become numb.

9:33 AM
Fingers now completely numb. Go back inside. Try to stop... er... glowing. (Because Fake Southern Women don't sweat).

9:40 AM
Take a shower. Realize arms are too sore and numb to wash hair, but only after putting shampoo in said hair. Begin to feel fingers again. They hurt. LOTS. Spend three minutes trying to wash shampoo out of hair without using hurting fingers. Start to fret that I might have frostbite.

9:50 AM
Get dressed and go back downstairs. Carry a load of laundry down at the same time. Cram laundry into the washer and turn it on. Hope there are no delicates amid the pile of smelly snow shoveling clothes because there is no way I'm digging through that cesspool to check.

9:56 AM
Drink a third cup of coffee while loading the dishwasher.

10:05 AM
Puzzle over why I have to use the restroom yet again, conveniently forgetting about the three cups of coffee I drank.

10:08 AM
Call for Molly to come eat her food and drink her water. After four minutes of cajoling, realize that the stupid cat won't come. Probably because she's not all that stupid. After all, it IS a blizzard, y'all!

10:12 AM
Play a game with the Tongginator. Something about fairies and rainbows and unicorns and stuff. Realize I need more coffee to remember game rules. Drink a fourth cup. Sneak emails during said game while pretending to thoroughly concentrate.

10:45 AM
Force the Tongginator to play by herself while I answer emails. Fingers continue to hurt. Commence serious fretting about possible frostbite. Rockstar Husband assures me (while trying to disguise an eye roll) that my fingers would be turning black if I actually had frostbite. Harrumph at him. Out loud.

11:00 AM
Notice that the back deck has another two inches of snow now covering the just shoveled cat paths. Feel depressed. Sneak another doughnut.*

11:07 AM
Feel fat with numb fingers. Become even more depressed. Eat another doughnut.* Repeat.

* okay, so - TECHNICALLY - they were cookies, but doughnuts somehow seem more socially acceptable when discussing breakfast

(And for those of you fretting about the cat, no worries. She showed up at around 8:30 last night, just after the skies cleared. And after I shoveled YET AGAIN. She's fat and happy, snug in her house. And my fingers are fine, too, thanks for asking. I mean, if you did. But you probably didn't. You were probably too busy worrying about the stupid cat. Or giving me an eye roll.)

28 comments:

Kiy said...

Reading the news this morning, and of course thought of you. Thought I'd stop in to see how you are doing. Yikes.

Oh, and don't read the weather reports for your part of the country for this weekend. You *won't* be happy and it might cause you to find more of those doughnuts*.

Good luck!
Kiy

bbmomof2boys said...

Coffee does the same thing to me...

Hugs,
Carla

*eye rolling here about the fingers!!*

Krista said...

I've partaken in a little "cookie therapy" myself this week. 40 inches of snow will do that to you. I think the calories don't count (cause of the 40 inches of snow thing). ;)

Elouise82 said...

I'm eating cake for breakfast, so no judgment here. And our great blizzard turned out to be a measly two inches of snow, so I don't even have that as an excuse!

I'm pretty sure all the shoveling you're doing counteracts any unhealthiness from the cookies - er, doughnuts!

organicnerd said...

Of course we decided to start a cleanse last week and the only sweet thing we can eat to rid ourself of blizzard blues is grapefruit. Nice, right? Husband and I are REALLY wanting some real cookies right now! Eat a few more for me, please!

Aunt LoLo said...

BWAHAHAHAHA. Honey, coookies are a PERFECTLY acceptable breakfast, as long as you had a glass of milk. When you start breaking out meatloaf, THEN we'll worry.

Football & Fried Rice said...

Snort! Chuckle! I always HATE it when I HAVE to go to the bathroom when I am SO Busy doing important things (like blogging, emailing, pretending to play a game with my kids!) That darn coffee!!

Glad your fingers are gonna make it!

jen@odbt said...

I am in awe that you're showered and ready in 10 minutes. Here's to donuts, cookies, baked goods in general...gotta keep up our energy for all the shoveling. Has Mount TM doing in front of your house?

Anne said...

What kind of silly southern gloves were you wearing? You need some REAL gloves. You may only use them once every 3 years, but no frostbite! =)

Rachel@just another day in paradise said...

you're really, really popular, because the news kept talking about your area (wash, dc and surrounding areas) last night. I'm sure it's because you live there, right? ; ) I (kinda) feel your pain. Last year, we had the mother of all ice storms. Imagine ice instead of all your snow. Then, imagine everything crashing down with all that ice on it. Then imagine kids that can't play outside AND no electricity (some for weeks) and you'll understand our winter last year. This year, we've gotten the snow you have, but just enough to make us wimps compared to y'all. : ) Hang in there.

(and if this doesn't make sense, I'm working on 3 hours of sleep bc of a sick kid. . .)

Debbie said...

I wonder how everyone would handle these blizzards without the internet? I think turning to each other keeps us from eating our young.

Myrnie said...

Lolo is right- cookies are totally a great breakfast, so long as you have a glass of milk! Mom says so :)

happygeek said...

Lolo made me laugh out loud.
Umm, speaking as someone who has had frostbite, trust me, when you've got it, you'll know.

It's when they don't hurt that you really want to worry. That and the waxy whiteness.

(Insert small rainbow.)

Janet said...

Doughnuts are a food group. A good one. So are cookies.

Kristi said...

If it makes you feel any better, we've been known to eat brownies for breakfast...

Briana's Mom said...

Seriously, it must stop snowing at your house very soon. Otherwise, you might fall into a cookie/doughnut coma due to shoveling guilt. That is not good. ;)

Suzy said...

Cookies and donuts are "well rounded" breakfast foods. And cookies can be really healthy - they can have fruit and nuts. And eggs. Maybe even oatmeal - that's a breakfast food! And the important thing is that you ate breakfast. Really!

kerri said...

Coffee and cookies, the breakfast of champions. ;)
The song the cat came back keeps going around in my mind, LOL,glad she is home safe and sound.

Mahmee said...

Geez, you're snowed in...in the middle of like 50 separate blizzards or something (OK...maybe it's 3. Three, Fifty, pretty much the same thing at this point). I declare here and now that any of the usual 'rules' regarding coffee and/or cookies DO NOT apply during snowbound-ed-ness....
M.

Cavatica said...

I never once rolled my eyes. They are frozen shut. Glad the stupid cat is okay. Oh, and you too. Is the cat really just a code for you? You can tell us.

LucisMomma said...

You poor thing! I guess I should really say, "Bless your heart!" seeings as how I'm from Alabama. But I'm also a Fake Southern Woman since I grew up Out West.

I do hope (serious here) that when the snow melts that it's not all at once so you don't have flooding problems.

Wanda said...

Sounds like another day in paradise. Glad the "cat" came back! (That would have been a hard post.)

3 Peanuts said...

The cookies make much more sense cause doughnuts are awfully filling;) hope you can dig out soon.

Super Mommy said...

Well, I'm exhausted, time for a nap! Well, maybe not, all that sugar from the *donuts* and the caffine from the coffee has me jittering right now! Did I miss the post that said Mr. Husband couldn't shovel snow?? LOL

Michelle said...

Just another reason to like you... cookies for breakfast!!

CC said...

TM, just call it like it is. Yummy, yummy cookies.

and I've been thinking about you every day that they talk about your weather. Which is every day if you watch the Today show while on the stair machine...

Aus said...

Well - good morning - and Happy New Year (the year of the Tiger in a few short hours ya know!) As for the frostbite - remember that I 'shovel' with a snow thrower (blower is too weak a word for this machine!) which - by it's nature creates a fine mist of snow that the slighest breeze blows back on the operator of the machine - I could write a book about frozen fingers / face / nose! But - it's still WAY better than a shovel! Glad the cat is OK - and the Boss is right about the black fingers too!

hugs ya'll - we're up to about 18 inches here - with more forecast for tomorrow night into MOnday - Happy New Year....yeah right!

aus and co.

Dita said...

If I had to be snowed in with anybody...Kid, you'd win....you just crack me up...oh, and you always have coffee and donuts (er, cookies) around! My kinda gal!