About Me

My little button

Our Little Tongginator

Blog Archive

Design by

Weaksauce Blogs
Friday, October 24, 2008

A Warm Blanket

I felt pretty grumpy and overwhelmed this week getting used to a "new normal" without my friend Rosie. I truly didn't realize how often I saw her until she was no longer around to see. I had a short fuse all week and sometimes suffered from unexplained crying jags. My poor husband received the brunt of my horribly moody self.

And let's just say I didn't win any Momma of the Year awards either.

The Tongginator, however, deserves a Sweetness Award. On Tuesday afternoon, I really needed a nap, plain and simple. The Tongginator felt sufficiently out-of-sorts that I knew I couldn't disappear for awhile into my cave bedroom, so I settled into a chair in the family room for a pseudo-snooze while the Tongginator puzzled away on the floor.

She woke me up twice during the first 20 minutes because she needed some mommy attention. I did not respond in a loving and patient manner. After I settled into the chair for a third time, I thought, 'This is it. If it happens again, I might as well give up. But I really need my nap.'

Sob.

I closed my eyes and started counting sheep. When I felt the Tongginator approach yet again, I tensed, biting my tongue and waiting for the opportunity to issue her a third and final warning. I felt so irritated. And then... then I felt the coziness of a blanket gently envelop me.

Love, comfort, nurturing, warmth.

The Tongginator became the mommy I should have been that afternoon.

And I wanted to weep all over again.

46 comments:

Chris and Deb said...

So sweet of the Tongginator....I probably would have wept too! :) Have a great weekend TM!

Stonefox (otherwise known as Heidi) said...

Well I have an award for you! Hope it will make your day a bit brighter (although I am sorry too! :) But I couldn't resist, it fits you so well!) Snuggle with that sweet girl of yours!

Stefanie said...

She's learned to be so loving because of the example you set.
Sorry to hear you are grieving so, but what a blessing to have had such a wonderful friend in Rosie.

Aunt LoLo said...

Good gardens grown sweet roses...or something like that. :-)

Have a great weekend - you deserve it.

planetnomad said...

This post sparked a lot of thoughts in me. I have been in a state where my children parented me like that, and it didn't feel good. I understand why it bothered you. But at the same time, it shows that she is learning empathy (and that it's being modeled for her as well; good job!), which is really important.
I'm sorry for the loss of your friend. I'm glad you have a little girl to share her blanket with you. What a treasured memory this will be; all the pain and hurt and exhaustion and love and pride and comfort, all mixed together like an opal shot through with colour.

jennifer said...

What a sweet post. We all have those times where we aren't the best parents, but God forgives us and so do our kids!! Thank goodness!

Half Gaelic, Half Garlic! said...

What a sweet little girl.....she knew her Mommy needed a little comfort!

It is amazing how they can sense when we are having a bad day or week....it is moments like these that can instantly set things into perspective!

I am sure it has been a very difficult week adjusting to life without Rosie.....I am so sorry...wish I knew what to say to make it better....it is just going to take some time!

Hugs,

Lisa

Lisa said...

I'm echoing Stefanie's comment here, TM....so sweet to see the T mirroring the love and tenderness that I'm sure you have modeled for her in caring for her and others so many times before this. Praying that Jesus brings comfort and healing to all your hearts as you mourn the loss of your dear friend.

Peanut said...

Awwwwww... what a sweetie :) She must have learned how to be caring from you!
I remember little moments like this when I was sitting on the couch in a fog after the loss of my grandma and of my friend... having my daughter climb up in my lap and cry with me or bring me some item of comfort... it's these little moments that will help heal your heart.
Still praying...

Heather of the EO said...

She is wonderful. So are you. You need to sob and weep and scream. Death will do that to a fine lady. I'm sorry. Still praying,
Heather

Mom to 5...Daughter of the King said...

I love those moments. Very humbling, aren't they.

Rebecca Ramsey said...

What a sweetheart! She knew Mommy needed some loving care!

Sharie said...

That is so sweet. I LOVE it when Amelia tucks me in. I'm hope sick today and was hoping to rest, but she is driving me nuts...(didn't have the energy to take her to daycare). Maybe if I lay down she'll tuck me in.

Sharie

Michelle said...

Oh, my...how absolutely precious!!!

3D said...

So sweet...

Hugs and keep smilin!

Briana's Mom said...

That made me tear up!

Monica said...

What a tender, responsive heart your little one has!...and what good medicine for your grieving heart.

Michelle said...

What a sweet little girl. She would only know how to do that from behavior modeled by you.

You and Rosie's family have been in my prayers.

LaLa said...

Oh, how sweet..I agree, she only learned to nurture by being nurtured. Sorry you are having a rough week....allow yourself time to grieve ..thinking of you!

The Source said...

Awww...what a little honey bun! Don't feel guilty about needed a little down time. You've certainly deserved it the last few weeks.

Amy said...

That's so awesome. Methinks another headband shopping trip might be in order - you know, just because she's such a great kid.

prechrswife said...

I have tears, too. It is funny how those rough patches come up, then all of the sudden, these children of ours can turn around and do something so completely sweet. She has learned well. :-)

Jerralea said...

That is sooo touching! See, you've raised her right!


God bless!

Kasey Hunt said...

Thanks for visiting my blog! What a beautiful daughter.

Kim said...

oh that touched me to tears! Praying that you feel better real soon. Peace and comfort. Comfort comes in all sizes when you least expect it, that is what makes it so special.

Carla said...

awww...now you've made me cry just telling me the story (can I blame it on PMS?). You are a good Mommy, you really are. {HUG} I hope your spirits are better in the weeks to come.

Amie@HeartSmiles said...

This had me in tears... What a sweet sweet girl!

Hugs to You!

:)
Amie

Janet said...

Hormonal mess that I am right now....that made me tear up! So sweet.

Don't be too hard on yourself. We all have our bad days.

Soliloquy said...

Well, dang. Don't you just hate it when your kids are more adult than you?

It happens all. too. often. here.

Beachy Mimi said...

So sweet!

Dawn said...

A little mommy in the making! Sounds like she's had a good example somewhere along the line.

Blessings!

discombobulated said...

what a warm fuzzy story. I'm so sorry you are missing Rosie.

Polar Bear said...

What a sweet girl. That story gave made me all teary.

I hope you can get some rest this weekend.

Many Sparkling Gems said...

So sorry! I have had those days before :). Ashley

redmaryjanes said...

A priceless moment. Know that she knows how to comfort and love because you taught her.
I can get a little short sometimes too. Life is hard. And you have been facing the loss of a friend and the fear that we all are now vulnerable. If it happened to Rose and her beautiful family, it could happen to us. And that is so sad scarey.

Special K said...

Even moms are entitled to a bad day now and then. Don't beat yourself up. You're going thru a rough time right now. And your little T realized that and gave you what you needed. That says something about all the good things you're doing as a mom, doesn't it?

Rebecca said...

Girl, I have those days... when I'm so busy and crabby with my kids, and then my daughter goes and makes pancakes for breakfast or something sweet like that.

I think it's wonderful. We aren't perfect, but the love we instill in our children enables them to love us right back even when we're having an 'off day'. They have learned the most important thing about love: it is unconditional. :)

Love!
Rebecca

Jennifer said...

How sweet. I want to weep right now reading this.

What a sweet little girl tongginator is. She is learning that from her Mommy.

Jen

mommy24treasures said...

awww that is one sweet girl:)

OziMum said...

Oooo you got lotsa fans today!!

Don't worry love, EVERYONE has days like that! Geez... I think I have one, every second day!

Tongginator is a gem!

Rachel said...

She sound so sweet adn loving.

I just came to your blog for the first time based on a comment you made on Kate's (Livin la Vida Lia). I have not read everything, but I've read enough to know I'll be coming back. I've so enjoyed reading adn love your style and sense of humor.

I look forward to getting to "know" you!

Rachel

The Byrd's Nest said...

Oh...my heart is aching. I know you must feel so sad but what a wonderful Mommy you must be because she is being such a good Mommy to you.

Big Hugs my friend.

kia (good enough mama) said...

It's already been said, but don't be so hard on yourself. Isn't it amazing how our kids can sense sometimes that we are "out of sorts" and they become what we need them to be? My little guy does stuff like this all the time-especially at those times when I feel like "if he interrupts me ONE MORE TIME...." They know. Somehow, they know.

Take care, my friend.

Patricia/NYC said...

So sweet...and like so many before me said, she most certainly has had a wonderful example in YOU!

Take your time to grieve, my friend, and take comfort in the memories that give you peace & make you smile.

HUGS!!

Patty O. said...

What a sweetheart. It always amazes me when kids show such empathy. My son will do little acts of kindness like this every once in a while and it is always when I need them the most. Almost like God whispered in their ears. I am so sorry for the loss of your friend.

Dawn said...

What a sweet little girl you've got. I'm sorry about your friend. You're entitled to have some bad days in the future because you are missing her.