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Tuesday, June 10, 2008

The Mall on Sunday

First, let me just say that if you adore shopping, then you quite probably won't like this post.

Because I really, really HATE to shop.

Unfortunately, I've done a ton of it lately: I'm currently experiencing what many of us like to euphemistically call The Middle Age Spread. (For you young'uns out there -- I've gained some weight since last year.)

Which means none of my shorts or capris fit anymore.

And it's really hot outside.

Therefore, I needed to go shopping.

Because heaven forbid I actually exercise to lose the weight. I, Tonggu Momma, do not believe in exercise, for several reasons.

1. I hate to sweat. It makes my skin feel really icky. It's completely a sensory thing for me.
2. It's not very fun.
3. I was born with asthma. Now, I know there exist many athletes who overcome this challenge and go on to perform amazing physical feats. I am not, nor will I ever be, one of them.
4. I am lazy. There, I said it.

Still, despite my desperate need for clothes that fit, I would never - not in a million years - NEVER think, "let's go to the mall on the WEEKEND."

Because the mall is really crowded on the weekend.

And I hate crowds.

It's another sensory thing, y'all.

But we went to the mall on Sunday afternoon because the Husband experienced a Tongginator vocabulary mix-up. The Husband asked the Tongginator, "do you want to go to the tot lot in a little while?" Of course, the Tongginator quickly displayed hysterical gratitude, which rapidly confused the Husband, who remembered that earlier that day the Tongginator expressed little interest in our backyard because it was "too hot outside." (And she wasn't being whiny, y'all. This weekend our area hit a record high.)

The Husband forgot a Very Important Point when discussing the afternoon's activities. In the Tongginator's world:

Playground = neighborhood park/ play area

Tot Lot = play area inside the local mall

Do you sense where this is headed?

We went to the mall on Sunday.

And it wasn't very fun.

On the plus side (both figuratively and almost-literally if I went up just one more size), I purchased some new clothes that fit... the Tongginator had a blast, since she ADORES the mall and rarely gets to go... and the Husband learned the difference between saying "playground" and saying "tot lot."

The End.

6 comments:

vpandash said...

I am right there with ya. I used to love shopping, but finding clothes for my big butt that don't make look 90 is a huge challenge. I too hate sweating, so exercise isn't my favorite activity. I am trying to improve my eating habits which works well...until the weekend, or eating out, or I get really hungry!

Briana's Mom said...

LOL! I hate going to the mall on the weekend too! Too crowded. And I absolutely love that it is now swimsuit season - not.

Cheri H said...

I too hate the mall! I don't mind shopping as long as it is not the mall. Hope you found some great clothes!

Carla said...

I don't mind the mall when I'm alone, but with kids - NO WAY! However, I adore online shopping. ;)

I think that was a good lesson for Daddy to learn.

Janet said...

I LOVE to shop, but NOT on the weekend. That's why I homeschool. So I can have the mall to myself on a Monday morning....;-)

CC said...

I USED to like the mall (notice the past tense). When I had more money to spend and more time....