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Thursday, March 6, 2008

Salamander Pregnancy

I am so not a patient person. I eat unripened fruit. My wardrobe consists of clothes found on displays nearest the aisles because wading through racks of garments seems, to me, like a waste of time. One year, during my misspent youth, I received three speeding tickets in less than nine months. And now, I'm feeling slightly irritated with my sister KK's unborn child because his/her debut appearance is "scheduled" for this Saturday, and it doesn't look as if it will happen on time. I want to meet this child, so much so that last night I felt tempted to bring a megaphone over to my sister's house and shout at her tummy, "Come on now ... get out here!"

Thankfully, God continues to grow my patience. I may sound beyond all hope to some of you. To that, I respond: Ha! You should have met me ten or (wince) twenty years ago! I apologize to all who knew me back then: my loving relatives, who often saw me at my worst ... Otter, who never reads this blog, but so deserves a mention anyway... and even discombobulated (yes, you: my friend who deserted me just when I found you again because you had to go and get married and move to Florida).

I'm now all about turning lemons into lemonade. This lengthy adoption wait is helping to grow my patience. For that, I thank God. Adoption will knock all (or most) of that impatience out of you. (Or the wait will drive you insane!) At present, we've officially waited almost 21 months to adopt from China, not to mention the additional five months of paperchasing before that. We probably have at least eighteen months left in our wait. It's the unknowns that kill you ... imagine being seven months pregnant and told, "oops! We gave you the wrong due date. You'll probably give birth in August instead of May." Now imagine that happening ... oh, I don't know ... TWENTY TIMES!

I used to compare my adoption wait to an elephant's pregnancy. Sadly, I've had to move on from that beloved animal, since there is no way we will receive a referral before June 2008. Goodbye, Dumbo. I'll miss you.

Now, I am a reptile ... an Alpine Black Salamander, to be precise. These little guys (or should I say gals?) live in the Swiss Alps. Their pregnancy lengths vary depending upon the elevation at which they reside. Those living at elevations around 4,600 feet will gestate the longest for about 38 months, which would put the end of my wait at or before August 2009.

If our adoption wait passes that mark, I'll have to move on from being a salamander. This will sadden me greatly, as I've become quite fond of the little gal. I'll instead morph into a Frilled Shark, which gestates for 42 months, and -- appropriately -- lives along the coast of Japan. They aren't nearly as cute as the Alpine Black Salamander, but they'll have to do.

After all, I am learning patience.


Janet said...

Hooray! Another person who loves salamanders as much as I do! :-)

I really hope you're more elephant, than salamander. (Boy, that was a weird sentence.)

ernurse said...

I feel so many emotions during my daily Togginator lesson/s that my brain usually cannot transfer my awe into prose. I always want to leave a comment, but my thoughts are all over the place. My mouth just hangs open because something I have just read in a few short minutes (written by someone whom I met when I was six-years-old, then again when I was twelve,and yet again at age thirty) generates emotions that stay with me for days. I learn more during my 2-minute Tongginator lession about philosophy, history, anthropology, psychology and all the humanities combined than any academic course ever taught me.
I feel hopeful and happy because of the adoption process. I feel frustrated and angry by the adoption process. I feel giddy when I watch the Tonginnator dance, and when I see a peanut in diapers singing Hey Jude. I practically herniate my gut laughing at The Husband's spider follies and The Tongginator's tell-it-like-it-is approach to life no matter where she is (the store, an airplane, school), and trying to picture the Tongginator at the store in plaid and stripes with her Asian-swirly-pigtails. I feel shock and dismay because Chinese women and babies have such a struggle and because The Tongginator is playing "airport security", instead of "hide-and-seek". I feel love for everyone because we're all in this together.

However, after reading today's blog, I had a clear emotion that I could easily form into a comment. I am embarrassed that it is so self-centered given the heaviness of the blog content. However, when I saw myself mentioned in the blog, I called NotRedBaron over immediately and said "Look, we're on the blog!" I can't believe it took something like that to finally make me sit down, wrestle with my thoughts, and leave a comment. Today, I am drunk with joy because I am blogworthy!

a Tonggu Momma said...

Of course you are blog-worthy! :) And quite a writer, too! I am humbled.