A couple of weeks ago, little Squirt and I ran into a woman I know from church.  I've chatted with her a few times and like her as a person, but we are no more than acquaintances.  I'm hoping to grow the relationship into a friendship of some sorts, mostly because I like her, but also because her daughter and Squirt will end up in the same grade at school eventually, and - if I'm honest with myself - maybe even a tiny bit because she is Asian-American.

Anyways, back to the day two weeks ago that we ran into her.

Squirt took one look at her and shouted, "Not Mrs. Moe!"

Mrs. Moe is a friend of mine who lived abroad this past year but returned to our neck of the woods over the summer.  She is Chinese-American and has three children (Eeny, Meeny and Miney), the youngest of whom was adopted from China.  Squirt and Miney belong to a playgroup of four girls, dubbed the Fearsome Four, all adopted from China and with just 13 months separating the oldest (Miney) from the youngest (Squirt).  Our four families live within 20 minutes drive of one another, each also have a third grader (three girls, one boy), and all feel pretty darn blessed to have these connections, both for ourselves and our children.

Anyways, back to the day two weeks ago that Squirt took one look at my acquaintance from church and shouted, "Not Mrs. Moe!"  Like, five times.  Five! times! she shouted it while I quietly sank through the floor.  I finally had to come clean and just say it... "I'm sorry.  My friend Mrs. Moe is Chinese-American and we saw her last Friday.  I think Squirt is realizing that you are both Asian-American, and that you are different people."

My acquaintance from church took it in stride.

At least, I think she did.

(I was too busy sinking through the floor to notice.)

Later I couldn't help but acknowledge that this would not have happened if Squirt had more daily contact with the Asian-American community.  I've tried to make conscious decisions about diversity, choosing Asian-American professionals often (such as our dentist, hair stylist, etc.), and seeking out different activities and events that lend themselves to a more diverse crowd.  And I know I'm in a better place than I was six years ago - that's for sure - but this incident with Squirt has me questioning if it's enough.

I don't know the answer.

This past weekend, I repeated the "how diverse is your world?" exercise the Husband and I took five years ago at a transracial adoption parenting seminar.  The results were much more diverse this second time, but I have to admit that most of my close friends are Caucasian; only three of my close friends are non-white.  Then again, I'm pretty introverted, so it's not like my friends list is all that long anyways.  But still...

Squirt shouting "Not Mrs. Moe!" showed me that I still have a long way to go.

How about y'all?

I cannot believe I forgot to blog all summer.  I had good intentions, of course, but I didn't realize I failed to blog even once.  Umm... sorry, y'all?

We are fine.  And I've really, truly appreciated the emails and comments some of y'all sent my way, checking in to make sure that Squirt was medically fine and the Tongginator still large and in charge.  Everything's been great, well, great *for us* anyways.  I think I just got out of the habit of writing and completely... forgot.

(Do y'all think I'm experiencing early-onset menopause?)

(Because I'm thinking maybe.)

To catch y'all up on our lives, I thought I'd compile a list of all of things I never thought I'd do that I've done since June.

1. I read a book to Squirt while sitting on the... you know.  Yes, I seriously did.  She was whining, and I really had to pee, and she brought me the book, so I just... well.. I read the darn thing.  It could have waited another 30 seconds, but it just seemed easier at the time to give in.

2. I signed up for TWO "mommy and Squirt" classes this fall: one music, and one music and movement, with an emphasis on movement.  My introverted, tone-deaf, non-athletic self still can't believe I did that.  But I did.  I'm hoping maybe I'll drop a pound or two before the holidays because of all that "gallop like a pony" and "hope like a frog" ridiculousness.  Only I'm using these classes as an excuse to up the chocolate intake, so maybe not.  One can wish, however.  Even if said wish is completely futile.

3. I watched the Tongginator swim the length of an Olympic-sized swimming pool with NO flotation device.  Oh, I nearly cried, y'all.  It took almost a dozen private lessons with a swim instructor who specializes in children with needs such as ADHD, autism and sensory processing disorder, but it finally happened!  The Tongginator learned to swim!  (I am so proud of her.)

4. Several weeks ago, two-year-old Squirt, in response to some (ahem) maternal correction, told me, "Squirt obey SQUIRT!"  With all of the language delays we experienced our first ten months home, I sometimes doubted I'd ever hear her say a complete sentence, much less one as sassy as all that.

5. Squirt and I were fired from early intervention services the second week of July.  Of course our therapists prefer to use the term "graduated," but what they really mean is "fired."  And I'm totally cool with that.  Squirt still has some slight gross and fine motor delays, but time and a little bit of effort on my part should resolve them within the next year or two.

6.  I attended a celiac parenting support group all! by! myself! this summer and made several new friends.  Two of the seven women I met are adoptive parents, and one is an adult adoptee.  They made me feel welcome and I don't think I embarrassed myself too badly.  Although maybe I did.  But as long as I remain clueless about it, I'm totally cool with it.

7.  Since the first week of June, I watched Squirt fight off three illnesses, without any need for antibiotics.  Which means she is finally developing an effective immune system, y'all.  Be still my heart.  Seriously.  BE STILL MY HEART, y'all.

8. I told the husband it was okay to purchase a new car.  Even though I would prefer that he not.  How in the world did my tight-fisted, financially cautious self get here?  I do not know.

9. I managed to make a half-way decent gluten-free pizza crust.  Of course my bread loaves still leave a lot to be desired, but the pizza crust (which is - ahem - flat) tasted pretty darn good.

I'd write a #10, but I can't think of anything.  Forgive me for being a bit rusty in the blogging department.  And I'd love to know how y'all are doing.  I confess I haven't read blogs either this past summer, so I need y'all to fill me in... what's up in your lives?

20 words or less.

Go.

So I promised to share with y'all my Shapes Songs as long as you don't make fun of my voice.  Because, well, I'm not known for my singing ability.  I mean, it's not horrific or anything, but that's because I did, like, seven takes of this little video until it was as good as it was gonna get.

Squirt is exploding developmentally, and I don't simply mean catching up.  She! is! exploding!  It's kinda freaky, actually, how fast her little brain is going, but it's wonderful to watch at the same time.  (I continue to feel stunned by the changes brought about from a simple dietary switch.)

So what can she do now?

Tonggu Momma: Squirt, how old are you now?

Squirt: Eight.

Tonggu Momma: Squirt, your sister is eight.  How old are you?

Squirt: I tree.

Tonggu Momma:  You're not three.  You're two.  You're two now.

Squirt: Bye bye, One.  Hi, two.

We must have had this conversation a half a dozen times this past weekend, y'all.  Happy belated birthday to the strongest toddler I know.  You have blessed our lives immeasurably this past year.  Thank you for being a part of our family.

Two nights ago my introverted self went out on a limb and attended a support group for parents raising children with celiac and/or gluten-intolerance.  I didn't know anyone there when I walked through the doors.

I left knowing I'd made at least two new friends.

I  think.

(I mean, maybe they hated my snarky self.)

One of the women is a momma to two children, one biological and one adopted from Russia.  Her biological toddler has Celiac.  And her adopted five-year-old son?  Her adopted son has sensory processing disorder and RAD.  I know.  I felt like we clicked, for obvious reasons.  I think she felt the same, especially since she told me, "I've never met anyone in real life who has struggled with attachment issues before.  I mean, I know people on-line, and it helps, but it's blowing my mind to meet someone in real life who has gone through what we are now going through."

She asked me how the Tongginator was doing, seven years later.

Walkerfam 00 asked what toddler apps we used to quiet a restless Squirt.  You know, during that "it would have been absolutely horrific without the iPhone" drive to Ocean City.  For some strange reason, I feel a bit like I'm leading y'all into sin, but I'll share our favorites anyway.  Because I'm evil like that.  And because I truly don't think that handing an iPhone to a bored toddler - in rare circumstances - is all that bad of an idea.

Now, if y'all had asked me that six years ago?

When the Tongginator was a toddler?

Oh, my lands, would I have tried to hold back all manner of sanctimonious, judgmental comments.  Because OF COURSE you don't hand an expensive gadget to a toddler.  And OF COURSE you limit screen time - goodness, a one-year-old shouldn't even have any screen time.  And OF COURSE you actively engage said child in finger plays and songs and games of I Spy instead of allowing them to zone out in front of a screen.

Umm... yeah... whatever.

(Oh, how the mighty have fallen.)

Well, y'all... it's not Celiac.  The doctor called two days before we left for our beach vacation to assure us that there is no possible way for Squirt to have Celiac.  Not only did her initial blood tests come back negative, but so too did the endoscopy AND the genetic testing.

Which means - despite all evidence to the contrary - she doesn't have Celiac.

But she still has... something.

You live to regret it.  And love it.  All at the same time.

I didn't blog last week because we headed to Ocean City, Maryland for an extended family vacation.  It's about a three hour drive with limited traffic, so it's not terrible.  Then again, it's not a fun three hours when a toddler screams the entire trip while the eight-year-old wonders aloud - every sixty seconds - why the toddler won't stop screaming.

Hence the iPhone.

I have a confession, y'all.  I don't care for Udi's.  I know, I know... I must be INSANE, since every! single! person! eating gluten-free seems to love it.  Well, except for me.  No offense to Udi's or anything, especially since I have never tried it toasted, so maybe I'll experience enlightenment when I finally drop a slice in the toaster.  But for right now... not exactly a fan.

Which leaves me striving to make my own homemade gluten-free loaf of sandwich bread.

A couple of y'all asked for the recipe I mentioned in yesterday's post.  Well, I found it in a cookbook suggested by one of my 2005 Tonggu travelmates.  Her family went gluten-free a little over a year ago and never looked back.  When she heard about Squirt's medical issues and my quest for a gluten-free house, she kindly recommended a couple of things right off the bat.

Y'all were so awesome in helping me feel less old, I thought I'd share a slightly humiliating story about myself.  The quest for the perfect gluten-free loaf of sandwich bread continues at our house, but I finally perfected the mostly edible gluten-free loaf of sandwich bread.

It took a couple of weeks though.

These last few days, I've been playing around with one recipe that I liked.  It tasted good.  The consistency felt pretty darn good.  But for some reason, I could NOT get that loaf of bread to rise more than three inches in height.  Oh my lands, y'all, did I beat myself into a lump of dough trying to figure this out.

Until one day...

(Tuesday)

I realized that my recipe created a one pound loaf.  And my bread maker?  My bread maker is sized for a two pound loaf.  I?  Am an idiot.

This concludes your laugh for the day.

(You're welcome.)